Once again I had a delivery that I could go home and prepare for. Which was good because we were extreme procrastinators with this baby. We had just set up the crib the week before, I pulled out all of Brynlee's baby clothes a couple days before and we got the car seat the day before. So we were really pushing it. Anyways, that night we were able to get the house cleaned and ready, pack our bags and get things set up with Adam's parents for watching Brynlee. We made sure to take in the last night with just us and Brynlee. We were both pretty anxious that night...I didn't get any sleep! I stayed up until about 1 am packing and doing last minute things, and then my mind was racing all night. All along I knew I wanted to try for a vbac. I also knew that there would be risks involved...but there would be either way I delivered. So a lot of the night I was praying and hoping I was making the right choice and that the baby and I would be be healthy and alright throughout the delivery. And just pure excitement to meet our baby girl!
We were supposed to meet Adam's parents and check in at the hospital at 7:30 the next morning, like always we were running late and didn't leave the house until about 7:15, then there was a bad wreck on the freeway that closed 3 lanes in the middle of rush hour. So we ended up getting there an hour late. We got all checked in and settled in my room. The delivery room was a nice and huge room. The hospital I had Brynlee in was brand new and everything was so nice. So I was excited to be in a nice delivery room. To induce me they used a balloon catheter, that when it was in me they filled it with water to the size of me being 4 cm dilated, and then let it do it's thing for 6 hours. So when I got settled in my room, Adam headed back to work for a couple hours to get things done since he would be gone for a couple weeks.
Since I never had contractions with Brynlee, I just always assumed I would be one of the lucky ones like my Aunt Cheri that didn't have to experience them...I was very wrong. One of my friends had this balloon catheter and made it seem like the worse most painful thing. So when they got it put in they came in every 15 minutes to fill it up until it was full, I was thinking it was cake. It didn't hurt at all. When it was full it was a little uncomfortable. Three hours later was when I started getting contractions, so I called Adam to let him know it was time to come back to the hospital. He got back in perfect timing, the contractions were coming on a little stronger when he got there and it was nice to hold his hand through them or have him rub my back. After the six hours were over, I was dilated to a 4 at about 4:00 pm. Dr Nelson said to keep it in 2 more hours. By this point it was really uncomfortable and put quite a bit of pressure on me. I was getting a lot of pain my lower back with the contractions, so I had Adam rubbing my back and I started crying because it was hurting so bad. Just then one of the resident Dr's came in with about 4 other residents and when they asked me how I was doing I lost it, I started sobbing uncontrollably and seriously could not stop. I was so embarrassed. They had told me that I could get the epidural if I was in a lot of pain. I knew I wanted to wait as long as I could because I had heard that the epidural would slow down progression and I didn't want that to be the reason for a c-section. So after they left I was finally able to calm down.
Side note **It was pretty funny, I was in control of the temperature in our room. And I was so hot the whole day and night, so it was set at like 63 and I was still a little warm, our nurses Kim and Rachel when they came in would be in two sweaters and Adam had a couple blankets on because they were so cold. **
At about 5:30 my contractions were about 5-8 minutes apart and not super consistent. So we decided to go on a walk before I got checked again. Oh my goodness, we just did about a lap and a half around the little office area and that got my contractions going, they were coming consistently 2-3 minutes apart. They checked me again at 6:00 pm and I was dilated to a 6. At this point I was not doing so hot. I started crying through the contractions, my back was killing me and I was ready for the epidural. It took a looong almost hour before the anesthesiologist made it to my room. The epidural was one of the single most amazing thing's I've gotten in my life. It started working pretty quickly and by 8:00 pm I was completely exhausted, didn't feel a thing and fell asleep for about 4 hours. The nurse came in and checked me at about midnight and I was at a 9, and I had been for a little while so they gave me a tiny bit of pitocin. At 1:00 am I was at a 10 and was ready to start pushing, at this point I could start feeling a little more, I definitely could feel the sensation to push when a needed. It was just the nurse helping me for the first 10 minutes and then Dr. Nelson came in. I can say that I'm sure I have never looked so horrible, pushing so hard I'm sure I had the ugliest face and my veins were probably popping out and I was kind of screaming...I'm sure it wasn't a pretty sight. But it was sure one of the greatest experiences. I pushed for about 20 minutes total. It was such a relaxed environment. Adam stayed up by my head holding my hand and giving me water when I needed it (pretty much between every push) and when they got Raegan's head and shoulders out they gave her to me to pull her out and put her on my chest. It was incredible! Adam got to cut the embelical cord, which he did not want to do...but Dr. Nelson just handed it right over to him (I don't think it was as bad as he thought it would be). And I just held Raegan on me until they took her over to check her and clean her off. It was honestly even better than what I was hoping for! Even through all of the ugly and kind of painful pushing, being able to hold my baby right when she was born was just amazing! It was SO much better than a c-section! And I was so so happy I was able to have a successful v-bac. I loved it so much I even told Adam right after I was ready to do it again. :) Raegan was a beautiful baby!! She was born at Friday August 8th at 1:34 am and was 7 lbs 13 oz and 21" long...and perfect!
We got the the post delivery room at about 4:00 am and were EXHAUSTED! When we got up there they had a wing that was closed and so they put us in a shared room, no one else was in there at the time but we were not excited about it! I felt so bad because all they had for Adam was a tiny uncomfortable chair. They wouldn't let him sleep in the other bed just in case someone else had to come in, which they were 95% sure no one would. So we ended up just sharing my bed, and some of the night all three of us were in there. But it was nice to be cuddled up to two of my loves. We made sure to ask everyone if a single room opened up if we could have it...so the next day we were thankfully moved to one. I might be weird, but I love being at the hospital after a baby. I LOVED all of our nurses...especially labor and delivery. They are all so so nice and do everything for me...so I enjoy it while I'm there. And with this being our second it was so nice to spend that 1 on 1 time with Raegan, and Adam. It took us half us the next day until we finally picked her name. The majority of the pregnancy she was going to be Alexa, and then 2 weeks before we added Raegan into the mix...and that it what we thought was perfect for her. That first night though we did have a little scare, we were both trying to sleep and Adam could hear Raegan making a weird little noise and checked on her and she was choking, it was really scary because she wasn't really breathing and her lips were already blue, luckily a nurse was just walking in and helped her out. But I was really nervous after that. She did it one more time, but we were always keeping an eye on her.
Saturday we were told that her beliruben was a lot higher than it should be. She had pretty bad Jaundice. But everyone we were working with made it seem like it wasn't a huge deal and that it would go down on her own. It did go down a little a Saturday and then Sunday it actually went up higher than it had been on Saturday. Once again the nurse was saying it wasn't a huge deal and seemed to be kind of pushing us to go, because that was the day we could go home, and actually we had to leave by that night. We decided we wanted to take care of it while we were there, so she was under the lights in our room all day Sunday. It was actually pretty sad because she had to wear protective eyewear, so by the end of the day her eyes were really irritated, puffy and red. At first they had her set up in her little hospital bassinet, and she would just scream...broke my heart! So after a while I just put her next to me on my bed, and she was able to sleep through a lot of the day. Adam ended up going to his parents to help with Brynlee since there wasn't anything he could do at the hospital. The nurse that was there was so sweet and would keep checking on me and would come in and keep me company for a little while. For dinner she took Raegan out to check her beliruben count again and held her while I had. I had a little panic attack break down, and started crying while I ate getting anxiety over being a mom of two kids and how I would be able to do everything and make both kids happy, and I was nervous I was already getting post pardom depression (I know I'm weird) so I said I little prayer to calm me and help me so I can be a good mom to my girls, and I got a very overwhelming peaceful feelings that things would work out.
Adam and his parents brought Brynlee to the hospital to meet her little sister. We wanted her to come earlier so bad, but knew that she would have a super hard time leaving us and Raegan knowing we couldn't go with her, so decided it would be best for her to meet Raegan right before we were going home so we could all go home together. Once again I had a lot of anxiety over how Brynlee would do...and she was amazing! It was such a sweet moment! Brynlee was so cute and sweet, she was asking a hundred questions about everything. She was a little bashful at first and then just wanted to hold her. She was very concerned about the little eye wear when we had to put it back on and if it was hurting her, and just wanted to hold her. About an hour later we found out Raegan's count had gone up even higher and were told she would have to stay at the hospital and be taken to the nursery to be put under the lights there. I started bawling! I was so sad, and kind of embarassed because Jim and LeeAnn were there and the nurses, but I couldn't stop. I was so sad to have to leave my new baby behind. Before we left Adam and Jim gave her a blessing, and then Adam, Brynlee and I dropped her off at the nursery. I was a mess...and I bawled all the way home. It was so sad to see the car seat in the car and not have our little baby in it, I was so excited for the drive home and to see Brynlee just stare at her the whole way. We were very happy to have Brynlee back though, she was so sweet that night and helped fill that little hole.
Surprisingly we actually slept really well that night, we were both so exhausted. We called first thing in the morning, and were told we could come in and sit with her. So we got ready and headed to the hospital. We were SO excited to see her! I ended up staying with her and holding her for about 4 hours while Adam took Brynlee to the aquarium, and luckily her tests came back and she was good enough to come home. I can't begin to say how happy I was that night. To have our whole family home together. I held on to Raegan all night, I couldn't stop starring at her. We were so so blessed with such a great delivery, healthy beautiful baby, and to all be home as a family.
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